Somewhere I belong

     The song somewhere I belong from linkin park is one of the best song ever sung by linkin park. The feelings and lyrics delivered is full of impact. It makes me wonder where do I belong to. What group? With group, you will always have the drama. For example, people say I am super chatty and extrovert. Do I belong there? Nope! I also do love my alone time. My time with just music banging into my ears. If I do not have a time for myself, I will be fully exhausted. I still like to do things alone.

    So do I belong in introvert group? Not really!! In a week, I need to come out once with my friends. Just some contact with the outside group is great. Okay now, what about the clever student group that always demand perfection? I can say a fact that I don't really demand on perfection! I just study and get good grades. I am not those achiever that sighs when I didn't get 10/10 for a test. If I know I improved then I will be happy already. So, maybe the super cheerful group? Well for people who don't know me, they will think that I am always happy. There was once a boy who says that I look like I strike lottery everyday. But for those who knows me, they know that I have my emo episodes. I would just shut myself from the world with music. Maybe dance to it when nobody is looking. Music truly relives my soul. Any bad things or memory that happen to me will be gone when I listen to the music. Listening to the emotions and falling in love with the meaning of the song is the best morning pill.

    In fact, I don't belong to anything or any group. I belong to myself. If I do things that pleases me and makes my inner child happy like she got the first candy in her life, I am content. I know when to be chatty, when to be happy in front of people and when to shut myself from the world. I strongly don't believe that I should show any sadness to anybody. They have their own problems. I don't want to be their problem. I want to be the reason why they smile. Not the reason they frown. I love to help people cause I know the situation where you had no help. All the pressure on you and nobody to help you lift it up. The pressure will seem like a very small weight but it will build its pressure over time and you will feel the pressure ten times after awhile. People who have been down this path knows very clear that help should be given if we can. This is because without any of this help, hope seems so dark and life seem so painful. Don't go down that road. You belong to yourself. Love yourself more than anyone else cause its your life not theirs. They can just decide that one day to leave you but you can't.

The bus theory

     I have my own theory on life. Life is a bus. The moment you were born, you are on a journey. You don't know which direction should you go first? To turn right or turn left? The first few miles of the bus ride will be guided by our parents. They teach us to move in the direction that a ethical person should go. They will show us the road that is bad or good and continue to direct you though you mess up. But trust me, never let them be the driver of your bus. If you wish to make a right turn, do make it. They will not be the driver of the bus but you. If they want you to be a doctor and you know deep down you want to be a dancer. Follow where your heart direct you. Your heart is where your dreams belong to.

     Besides that, people that get in to your bus can be a great company or just the absolute worst. People that enter your bus are like associates, friends, enemies and lover. They may stay awhile in your bus or stay there till you reach your destination. Sometimes, great company may just leave along the way and you might be hurt but always remember that when people leave, others will have the chance to come in. Maybe that great company that left you will be replaced by a greater company.

     However, not a bus ride are the same. It might begin on a hard road then goes smooth or vice versa. It might be a U-turn, a roundabout or even a stop at the traffic light. No matter what or how is your ride, you all will end up to the same destination. That destination will be death. Therefore, always remember that its not the destination that count, but the ride to the destination. 

Best feeling ever !!!

     I would say that after all that I had done in my life, the feeling of knowing that you had improved is seriously the best feeling ever. The feeling that you had hit rock bottom or fall down to the face of the earth and manage to get back up is a magnificent feeling ever. I finally got back my target gpa which is 3.8. When I saw the result, I was too happy that nothing can pull me down. After all the things that happen during my last semester and to get such a great result is fantastic. I love this feeling. I do hope I can maintain this high and be a first honour graduate. Hahaha.

     Besides that, I can finally go on a trip to sabah. My high school friends invited me to go to Kinarut with them. All I will do is eat, eat and eat there. I am going to weigh heavier when I come back. The best part of all is that Kinarut is famous for seafood. My favourite. All the prawns, crab, lala, and anything from the sea is what makes my stomach roar. I can't wait to go there since its just another 2 months hehehe. Once I finished my semester then I will go with them.

     The music that I heard during the semester break is the best. Cool Kids by Echosmith is the bomb. I keep singing to it and true enough I wish to be like a cool kid. Oh yah and the another best part was that I finally finished watching American Horror story. Season 2; Asylum. I love how there idea of satan and alien is link cause I am an alien believer. Try talking to me about alien. You won't stop hearing me blabber for hours. Even for my oral presentation, I did existence of alien and got 9.5 over 10 as my lecturer believe the theory after my presentation. BOOYAh!!!! How I wish such feelings can continue and stay with me till the day I took my last breath.  

Inside Out!

     There is a new movie that I am dying to watch. But its coming out next year. OMG, I need to wait for so long to come out. Well, Pixar you done it again. You brought that little girl in me. That little girl was full of glee and all she saw was happiness when the trailer come out. From Toy Story to the most current animated movie, Wall -E. I love you Pixar. Every movie you guys animated is beautiful. They teach us the meaning of life. The struggles, the joy, the love. You guys bring me into a roller coaster of emotion when I see one of the movies especially Monster Inc.



     Well, let get back to the upcoming production which is Inside Out. The movie depicts on how our emotion works. From joy, anger, disgust, fear and sadness, Pixar manage to bring them into wonderful characters. I love the part where joy was holding the girls memories. It makes me wonder that whether my own emotion does that. Sometimes they will hold a memory and make me emotional. Well, its a theory. Inside Out is a brilliant movie and its what I am going to anticipate next year.

PS: The link is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1t0A_tZGrYw

Glee!!

To be honest people, I am a gleek!! How can you hate a music club that is struggling and achieve its dream in the process. OMG, I remember how much I love Finn. RIP. I love their songs and they are the best.

Glee is the best. The whole season is about teenage drama and I know that I am no longer a teenager but I miss does drama. I used to watch glee every week and I love it more than ever. The song don't stop believing is the best. Lea Michele have the best vocal in glee. Holla!! Especially Puck !!! The baddest boy in glee oh god. My fangirl inside of me is screaming hahaha!!

Can't wait for season 6 omg omg omg !!!

Best Birthday Ever!!!

    Happy belated birthday to me !! Oh yea! I can say that life is super funny but there is one thing for sure. When you are comfortable with yourself, the people surrounding you will be attracted to the real you and not the fake you. Last birthday, I swallow my pride and change my ways to be more sociable and ended up with a not so grand birthday. Compared to this year, last year was a bit at the disadvantage.

    On my 20th birthday, I got around 4 cakes, 1 ice cream, 1 dinner for my birthday. I thankfully to those who gave me all these wonders in the world. If it wasn't for exam, I would be crying my ass off for getting such kind gestures because normally its the other side. Normally, I will be the one giving these kind gestures but never get anything in return like last year. But karma do work and what goes around come back around. I even got my first present after 3 years of no birthday present. OMG its my favourite pikachu characther. 

     When I got the pikachu, I nearly cried as for the first time someone actually care me and took notice of what I like in life. There is always a few reasons why I love pikachu.

1) Pikachu was the underdog in the whole series in the beginning but become like the main lead in the later series. I was an underdog in school for academic performance, athleticism  and society works but I try my best to learn and learn and become the best.

2) Pikachu didn't ever change although evolving to Raichu would make him look stronger but he never change himself. I don't want to change myself to look stronger. I know that I am stronger.

3) Pikachu is a great friend. There was a moment that Ash got frozen and pikachu stay by his side and cry. His tears shown his true friendship to Ash. I want to make all my friendship just like his. To stand by their side and support them whenever they in trouble!

     What a great day to have my birthday!! The moment you feel when all your problems just disappear and your friends are there to celebrate with you is the best feeling in the world. Tonight, I watch some fireworks and had the biggest joke in my life when my friend told the bus driver to masuk pagar. She pratically just ask the bus driver to go through the gated part of the hostel. If these kind of happy days can last forever, I wish it can be so happy everyday !! 

You are part of a clique

      As usual my morning starts with a cup of coffee and today I had to eat instant noodles as my bicycle is still traumatized by the accident yesterday. My morning always start with me switching the laptop on and looking at my facebook wall. My friend share a website on what kind of friend are you? I click on it and did a few quiz and I got  You are part of a clique

      Friendships are what make life so enjoyable. The friends you've got are often people you have known for a long time, who have stuck with you through thick and thin. You form a loyal little gang who protect each other and care for each other. You can be frank with each other and you know how to pull together during difficult times. Your friends keep you grounded and you're never bored when they’re around. They are affectionate and fun and there is a positive energy in the air when you spend time together. You all understand that it's the quality of the time you spend together, not the quantity, that counts. You enjoy meeting up and look forward to it when the occasion arises. You prepare for it in an almost ritualistic manner, each member of the group with their own important role. You gel together well because of mutual respect for your loyal, warm ‘second family’. Friendship is precious to you and is a vital part of your journey through life. You know that it is something to be shared, and that you must cultivate your friendships with love.

You are part of a clique was something I think I got as this totally remind me of me and my high school friends. Man I miss them. Why can't life be like this? When I am with them, I feel so alive. No hiding of my true self. I could blast each one of them without caring as they are people who knows I am not there to hurt them. Oh yea! At least I had such a friendship!!!